Can You Spell RELIEF?

My absolutely LEAST favorite holiday is rapidly approaching.

Passover. For the unknowing, this is a Jewish holiday that celebrates the exodus from Egypt and the emancipation from Pharoah-Ramsees. It is a joyous holiday because it represents freedom and obtaining the 10 Commandments.

It is also a time for major changes in one’s eating habits and that, my friends, results in some pretty heavy duty damage to the intestinal system.

NO leavened products. You can eat nothing that has any kind of yeast or rising products in it.  The ‘bread’ for 8 days is Matzoh…think uber-sized communion cracker and you’ve got the image and the taste.

Pardon my Mr. Rogers-esque take here, but, Can you say, CONSTIPATION??

Here is the rundown of the meals…

Breakfast—fried matzoh (which is actually quite good but matzoh nonetheless) or perhaps matzoh meal pancakes or maybe a lovely matzoh roll or matzoh bagel?

Lunch—chipped ham (JUST KIDDING!!!) on a matzoh roll or matzoh bagel or perhaps on two sheets (yes, they are called sheets) of good old plain matzoh…filling would be maybe…egg salad, or maybe peanut butter and jelly (that is quite fun…watching the jelly squeeze through the tiny holes in the matzoh…kind of looks like it is bleeding…especially if you use seedless black raspberry preserves!

Snack—matzoh sheet broken into 4 sections and slathered with butter…I use at least 1/8 pound on each sheet

Dinner—brisket ( a Jewish staple folks!) with salad (that’s safe vegetables) and matzoh farfel kugel (too many Jewish words for ya there??)  That would be a casserole that you make with small broken up pieces of matzoh.

Dessert–believe me when I tell you that as fantastic as the strawberry whip is (and it IS de-lish), dessert MUST be some form of fruit compote that includes at the minimum prunes, figs and apricots.

Now THAT spells, relief!

Passover, 8 days, starting Saturday night, April 19…..excuse me while I plan my own personal exodus…relief!


1 Response to “Can You Spell RELIEF?”

  1. April 18, 2008 at 2:03 am

    But…but…watching the jelly squeeze out was always one of my favorite things as a kid…that and the butter…mmmm…..butter

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